7 Critical Phrases Leaders Must Avoid for Effective Negative Feedback

7 phrases to avoid when giving negative feedback to your team.

Giving negative feedback is the one skill I get asked about the most from new leaders.

Good feedback takes practice and a great deal of self control.

Giving feedback without that can end up a disaster. Where you walk out of the meeting saying, “I wish I said that better.” or “Why did I even say that?” 🤦‍♀️

It’s okay to mess up as you’re learning.

And hopefully you can learn from some of mine.

Here are 7 phrases you should avoid saying when giving feedback to your team.

1. “I’m disappointed in you” Personalizes the criticism.  Focus on the behavior, not the person.

2. “You’re overreacting.” Invalidating. Acknowledge feelings and have some empathy.

3. “Don’t take this personally.” Often precedes personal criticism and this is personal to them.  Be mindful. If youre saying this, re-examine your words.

4. “It’s not a big deal” Minimizes feelings.  Validate their concerns.

5. “You’re not listening.” Accusing.  Aim for understanding. Clear communication is your job.

6. “I told you before.” Piling on and distracting from the issue. Offer clear directions and find new ways to say it.

7. “We’ll discuss it later” Vague and not actionable. Set a specific time.

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Clear, empathetic, and direct communication is essential in effective feedback.

Make sure your team feels heard and valued to foster a positive environment at work.

Feedback is hard, especially negative feedback.

Try this advice. Itll be a little easier and your team will appreciate you for it.

If youre still struggling, let me know. Id love to help.